The Difference Between Listening and Hearing
3 Ted Talks to Improve your listening skills
Have you ever been talking to someone and you notice their eyes glaze over? Have you ever been sharing a story, and someone gets a text and they say, “keep going, I’m listening,” as they text someone back? Have you ever talked to someone and you realize that you are not listening? They say a word that triggers your to-do list or a story that you want to share. We are all guilty of this.
Listening takes practice, awareness, and intention.
“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand, they listen with the intent to reply” – Stephen Covey
Why is it so hard to listen? Think back to the last argument you had with someone, the last meeting you were in, or the last project you worked on in a group. How did you use active listening?
There is a strong difference between listening and hearing. Oftentimes, our minds take us down a trail after someone says something that sparks a thought. After a few seconds, we realized we didn’t hear a word the person had just said. When talking with someone, take in everything that they say, process this information, and retain it. Work to care deeply about the thoughts of others. Listen because they also have something important to say.
Think about a situation where you truly felt heard. Leaning in and authentically processing what another person is saying rarely goes unnoticed. When we genuinely listen and work to understand where the other person is coming from, the more likely they are willing to listen to us.
Let’s read this again: Listening takes practice, awareness, and intentionality. When you join a conversation with another individual join it intentionally with the purpose to not only talk but to listen to their thoughts.
Be present in that moment
Put your phone and other distractions away
Don’t listen to respond. Listen to understand what they are saying.
Conclusion
“When you talk, you are only repeating what you already know. But if you listen, you may learn something new.” Dalai Lama.
In business and in life, we must never stop listening and learning to those around us. We must join conversations humbly with the intention that we can learn from the person we are engaging with.